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Thursday, June 14, 2007

Salaam Namaste - More like Goodbye Daa!!

Rating : 3/10 - (1) Awesome locales (2) For the amazing sandwich and delicious caramel porpcorn.(3)Brilliant Javed
And yeah I forgot, Jugal Hansraj exists in the movie too!!! I take ½ back
Rating : 2 1/2 outta 10

"Salaam Namaste to all ", the radio booms. A beaming Preity : a medical student .India and ghar se faraar ladki ( urf Umber), hosts this "Mera Bharat Mahaan" radio show first thing in the Australian morning. She speaks in Hindi; her audience is Indian, but plays non-Hindi music! Yeah, there is also this special guest who's interviewed every morning (Yawn .. at 7). Saif : learning architecture for fathers sake and a Cooker!!,,oops Chef at a Nick of time Restaurant for His own sake (Urf Nikhil Arora oops Nick ), flaunts his superman underwear, hates people who refer to him as Nikhil arora and generally hates marriage, kids , commitment and anything that ties him up; You know , the wanna have fun whole life types!!! To get on with it, Nick is called as a special guest to this radio show and conveniently is found sleeping in his Undy, while Preity announces his name on her radio show. Her Malayali or Tamilian, some sort of Southy variety nincompoop boss informs her that Nick is not coming. And then starts this supposedly funny Character assassination, mental harassment of Nick on the show, by Humber( Her southy boss calls her that!!!).

Well, so long, so boring!! Then starts their story where they meet, greet, dance, get drunk, fall in love, propose to stay together, shift together in separate rooms, shift together in same room and become one!!! Soon enough they become three and Nick with his no Commitment kaa Bhongaa, splits the relationship. Which seems neither too painful to Umber nor to the Nanga-punga Nick. And then if you have seen "Nine months" its better you split, or you would witness the murder -- no murder's too subtle!! You would witness the brutal public assassination of a very sweet and funny Hugh Grant movie.

The setting is beautiful Australia. But what you get is a Beer without any fizz. In fact a Beer that's not even teensi weensi bit good. The director "whoever" cooks up a khichdi with vibrant colours and burns it. Even the songs fail to impress (except one song- My dil goes hmmmm). When you see the movie you try to wonder what is more irriating:
1) Saif's semi nude antics
2) Or his bawdy clothes
3) Or Preity's screaming
4) Or her dance with a bloated abdomen
5) Or the lack of sensitivity or soul or creativity in the film
6) Or the Radio company owner's blabber
7) Or Saif's own boss's accent
8) Or the forcible attempts on comedy.
9) Or the waste of Arshad Warsi ( in a subdued role)
10) Or the 'attempted' funny fights between Saif and Preity
11) Or the nonsensical try to jerk a tear or 2 from the audience's eyes
12) Or the plot and the very idea of making this film.

With regard to the performances: Saif hams his way to nudity!! The shallow character building doesn't help either.Preity tries to infuse some sensitivity, but fails due to the complete lack of it in the script itself. Arshad Warsi is wasted. Javed jaffery rocks in his cameo with his hilarious hinglish.

All in all, a waste of your time and hard earned money. Seriously, if you had high hopes, wrap them in a polythene and burn it. Don't throw it in the gutters haan, this might cause just another 26/7 !!! I wasn't surprised to see that this films grossed more than probably Iqbal, Hazaar Khawishein aisi combined.Standing ovation for the Indian audience!!! We like the glittering wrapping more than the gutless, vacuum filled interior. So, carry on if you think I am shallow!!!
Maybe its time to grow up and appreciate good cinema rather than such candy coated crap…..

Salaam Namaste, huh!!!More like Aadam,khushaamdid,Alvida,Goodbye n good riddance!!!

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